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so i'm back in the lonely house. dropped gaby off.. went to see meet the fockers after sharing some eggnog and funny stories. blegh. i'm in a meh mood. is it bad that lately i don't have the patience/give a shit for and about things that i used to? aka people. yes, 'tis the season of giving, and i've done my share of some damn good giving, but i really.. i dunno. i guess i can start the "what i'm grateful for and what i'm not grateful for" list. BLAGHHHGSHGHWAET! where to begin?!?!
i guess i can start from today and work backwards. today, as it turns out, was really good. a good christmas? imagine that. i had been on a sewing binge and made the most awesomest purse for gaby and the most kickass shoes for christine and the cutest make-up purse for my aunt colleen. also baked a whole bunch of brownies and chocolate pretzels and a christmas poo, and drove out to bowie, MD to celebrate with some of the o'mahoney's i hadn't seen since my aunt's wedding a year ago. it's crazy to see my cousins chris, brian, mike, and matt all grown up, er, semi-grown up (the youngest is in 4th grade). they really are good kids. i just wish i hadn't missed all those years that we could have been hanging out and getting to know each other, like i know the kids on my vargas side.. 5 years. funny that i have to be reminded that i have a dad that i could be spending christmas with while my mom and my whole family is in the philippines. funny how i still didn't. BLARGLEBAAAGH!
and yesterday. christmas eve. had the ghettoest x-mas eve celebration in the history of all vargas creation. probably b/c the celebration consisted of 3 of the hybrids, the family jew, and the white boy boyfriend inductee. funny how that white boy kid has known me since i was 9. basically more than half of my life. he practically is my cousin now. but it was nice.. granted, our dinner was salad, ghetto garlic bread, vegetarian lasagna, and the batch of chocolate pretzels i forgot to add 2/3 cup of sugar to........ 'twas quiet. 'twas nice. the shirts i deconstructed/constructed/appliqued/sewed for my cousins were fun. i like making things.
and the day before that. ohh.. the day before that. flew home from orlando. went crazy christmas shopping. got totally shitfaced at robyn's. yep. became totally incoherent. actually, i became totally incapacitated on the bathroom floor. that, believe it or not, was a very good time. saw a million people i hadn't seen in a long, long time. i was GLAD! haha.
oh and the days before that.. orlando.. iiiinteresting. very interesting. it was fun in that draining sort of sense. felt like every drop of patience and every essense of sara was squeezed dry. i just wanted to run for shelter or some type of safe haven. ipod + window bus seat became my sanity bubble. amazing how much drama develops when a group of people decides to pretty much solely hang out with that group of people. how i gravitate towards the anonymity of "belonging" to many different types of groups! BLEGH! i tell ya, band has it's characters. it's like all or nothing. i guess the whole freaking world has it's characters. the know-it-alls, the drama queens, the flirts.. dude these kids go all out! but it's whatever. more power to 'em. at least they know who they are and embrace it.
who the fuck am i?! that's what i wanna know!!!!
anyways, now that i have come to the stunning realization that after much previous agony, i have to figure myself out all over again, i am happy to announce that flint 4A-ers are by far some of the coolest kids i have met, ever. chris, dave, and christa's christmas calls all made my day. yay. i miss them.................
so as for my patience and not giving a shit feeling, it's a good thing! er, how to explain.. basically i have no patience for this shit anymore--the blowing sara off, the complete, blatant disregard people have for others, in essence all the ways people could possibly think of (oh, there are many) to be utterly inconsiderate. so now i just ignore it, and pray that others will have some sort of epiphany and realize that "oh my god! i co-exist on Earth w/ other PEOPLE! other things! other LIVING things! the earth is living! there are other things that are beyond me in importance, like the sun!" so i don't care, i'll sit back, i'll take whatever you throw at me, i'm living.. i'm alive. my impatience has caused me to forgive you indefinitely. see, i forgive before you even say you're sorry!
merry fucking christmas. enjoy your presents.
i guess i can start from today and work backwards. today, as it turns out, was really good. a good christmas? imagine that. i had been on a sewing binge and made the most awesomest purse for gaby and the most kickass shoes for christine and the cutest make-up purse for my aunt colleen. also baked a whole bunch of brownies and chocolate pretzels and a christmas poo, and drove out to bowie, MD to celebrate with some of the o'mahoney's i hadn't seen since my aunt's wedding a year ago. it's crazy to see my cousins chris, brian, mike, and matt all grown up, er, semi-grown up (the youngest is in 4th grade). they really are good kids. i just wish i hadn't missed all those years that we could have been hanging out and getting to know each other, like i know the kids on my vargas side.. 5 years. funny that i have to be reminded that i have a dad that i could be spending christmas with while my mom and my whole family is in the philippines. funny how i still didn't. BLARGLEBAAAGH!
and yesterday. christmas eve. had the ghettoest x-mas eve celebration in the history of all vargas creation. probably b/c the celebration consisted of 3 of the hybrids, the family jew, and the white boy boyfriend inductee. funny how that white boy kid has known me since i was 9. basically more than half of my life. he practically is my cousin now. but it was nice.. granted, our dinner was salad, ghetto garlic bread, vegetarian lasagna, and the batch of chocolate pretzels i forgot to add 2/3 cup of sugar to........ 'twas quiet. 'twas nice. the shirts i deconstructed/constructed/appliqued/sewed for my cousins were fun. i like making things.
and the day before that. ohh.. the day before that. flew home from orlando. went crazy christmas shopping. got totally shitfaced at robyn's. yep. became totally incoherent. actually, i became totally incapacitated on the bathroom floor. that, believe it or not, was a very good time. saw a million people i hadn't seen in a long, long time. i was GLAD! haha.
oh and the days before that.. orlando.. iiiinteresting. very interesting. it was fun in that draining sort of sense. felt like every drop of patience and every essense of sara was squeezed dry. i just wanted to run for shelter or some type of safe haven. ipod + window bus seat became my sanity bubble. amazing how much drama develops when a group of people decides to pretty much solely hang out with that group of people. how i gravitate towards the anonymity of "belonging" to many different types of groups! BLEGH! i tell ya, band has it's characters. it's like all or nothing. i guess the whole freaking world has it's characters. the know-it-alls, the drama queens, the flirts.. dude these kids go all out! but it's whatever. more power to 'em. at least they know who they are and embrace it.
who the fuck am i?! that's what i wanna know!!!!
anyways, now that i have come to the stunning realization that after much previous agony, i have to figure myself out all over again, i am happy to announce that flint 4A-ers are by far some of the coolest kids i have met, ever. chris, dave, and christa's christmas calls all made my day. yay. i miss them.................
so as for my patience and not giving a shit feeling, it's a good thing! er, how to explain.. basically i have no patience for this shit anymore--the blowing sara off, the complete, blatant disregard people have for others, in essence all the ways people could possibly think of (oh, there are many) to be utterly inconsiderate. so now i just ignore it, and pray that others will have some sort of epiphany and realize that "oh my god! i co-exist on Earth w/ other PEOPLE! other things! other LIVING things! the earth is living! there are other things that are beyond me in importance, like the sun!" so i don't care, i'll sit back, i'll take whatever you throw at me, i'm living.. i'm alive. my impatience has caused me to forgive you indefinitely. see, i forgive before you even say you're sorry!
merry fucking christmas. enjoy your presents.
posted by Sara at 3:52 AM
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