meh i don't wanna be 20

'20 going on.....'
Tired at 20 years old
Memory collecting before his time
Recall the old stomping ground
I see a tear welling up in his eye

No, you can't cheat time, don't let that control your life
Hold your breath, close your eyes, just jump in, the water's fine

These pleas fall on deaf ears
Ears that were once tuned to truth
A dated, washed up old man
He's seen it all, nothing else for him to do

No, you can't cheat time, don't let that control your life
Goes over your head, you look over your shoulder
When you turn back you're that much older

It slips away
Be what you're becoming
It slips away
And not who you were
It slips away
Grab hold of the here and now while you still have the chance

So are you giving up now?
As for adventures you're had your fill
Who says you're over the hill?
I think it was you and you know very well

You're holding yourself back
(Turn your face to the day)
When you could be doing anything
(Don't just dig your own grave)
When will you treat yourself
(Take with you what you learn)
The same as I do
(Be yourself, now who you were)

I want to see you use your capabilities
Build me an ocean then destroy it with your eyes

from my window seat

so today i picked up my new glasses (spiffy, eh?) and i recognized the guy who got them for me from the back from elementary school, and i think he recognized me too. so i looked at his name tag, and sure enough "eshan" was his name, he had a crush on me in like 6th grade and i didn't like him and i think that's why he didn't say anything. funny. i am a scaredy cat when it comes to that kinda thing! always wait for the other person to recognize me first.. actually i think i am turning into more of a scaredy cat lately. i used to be a big shy wuss before.. for like, ever, then i grew some balls and became less of one, and now i think i am wussy and vulnerable again! geez!
but then i wore my glasses out the store and dang! they are waaaaaay different than my old ones. everything was like warped and bubbly it was so weird to actually see! much different than contacts. i will get used to them.
i'm excited to be leaving on friday. it feels like the home stretch. i had a nice break, even though i just worked. it was good to hang out with my family. i had fun at the dinner party last night! tomorrow hopefully i will hang out with two of my other aunts and uncles, i think it will be fun. i didn't really hang out with my friends at all, and i think as a result i'm much more relaxed. we're on different schedules, i guess, whatever. i think i've realized last year how much i am grateful for my family. all of them, and all of their craziness. on both sides. how can family NOT care? i think sometimes it seems like they don't. "everyone's on different schedules," but when it all boils down, family is family. who cares about all the other bullshit? other people suck. anyways, it's the home stretch. i'm out of reston, this hellhole that i thought i missed, and i can finally have some fun for about a week, get through next semester, and i can live on my own this summer. i can be with steve and friend davey baby!

hmmm

The Wild Rose Random Brutal Love Dreamer (RBLDf)     shmolorful, but unpicked. You are The Wild Rose.     Prone to bouts of cynicism, sarcasm, and thorns, you excite a certain kind of man. Hoping to gather you up, he flirts and winks and asks you out, ultimately professing his love. Then you make him bleed. Why? Because you're the rare, independent, self-sufficient kind of woman who does want love, but not from a weakling.     You don't seem to take yourself too seriously, and that's refreshing. You aren't uptight; you don't over-plan. Romance-wise, sex isn't a top priority--a true relationship would be preferable. For your age, you haven't had a lot of bonafide love experience, though, and this kind of gets to core of the issue. You're very selective. Your exact opposite: The Dirty Little Secret Deliberate Gentle Sex Master     The problem is them, not you, right? You have lofty standards that few measure up to. You're out there all right, but not to be picked up by just anyone. "You're never truly single as long as you have yourself." ALWAYS AVOID: The Bachelor CONSIDER: The Vapor Trail. Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating. My profile name: lime9